Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Fail: Cake Pop (★ ★ ☆ ☆ ☆)

Ah, the wonder that is cake pops.

How can you not love them?  At the very least, if you don't like cake you have to find little spheres of Cookie Monster's head with a mini chocolate chip in his mouth absolutely adorable.
Sadly, this story does not actually involve the sugared king.  No, this story is more akin to a tragedy.  A tragedy on so many levels.  Read on with me...

Once there was a baketress.  
She liked creating tasty treats, especially if they were chocolate.  
And she was also not afraid of a challenge.  

There was a spreading trend throughout the land.
One where mini cake bites were served on sticks.
And often reminiscent of childhood characters or of Han Solo in Carbonite. 

This baketress found herself called to the little treats.
Not wanting to miss this cultural phenomenon, 
she scoured high and low for a worthy recipe.

She followed the details to a tee.
For a dutiful baketress she certainly was.

Painstakingly dipping each stick into various forms of chocolate...
Insuring that each pop would would remain intact against the evil forces of gravity.

Carefully molding each morsel...
                        And chilling to the proper temperature...
                          to prevent crumbling.

Our heroine assembled the sweets,
one by one.

But alas, when her enticing neon green became a shade of infant food,
She should have taken this as an awful foreshadowing.
...A baking curse, if you will...

The pops she had so carefully fashioned suddenly turned to mush.
The blobs became too heavy and fell off the sicks.

She tried to make the best of the situation by changing tactics.
Maybe rounded cake bites would fare better?

But these turned out no more worthy than the rest.

As the last remnants lay wasted on the perfectly placed parchment paper, 
our unrelenting baketress had to admit that she was no match for the angered forces at hand.

Yellow beaded sugar crystals slid to the ground like defeated tears. 


But this story doesn't end there...

Flash forward to Christmas one year later, the little baketress was bestowed a cake pop making kit.  
She was apprehensive at first - the sheer thought stirred up old resentments,
But with the help of her benefactor, together they perfected the confectionary treat. 

It appeared as if the spell had been broken! 

And cake pops were enjoyed by all. 

The End.

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